Buddhist Boot Camp Read online

  BUDDHIST BOOT CAMP

  by Timber Hawkeye

  The intention is to awaken, enlighten, enrich and inspire

  This book is dedicated to you.

  What Is Buddhist Boot Camp All About

  Buddhism is all about training the mind, and boot camp is an ideal training method for this generation’s short attention span. The chapters in this small book can be read in any order, and are simple and easy to understand. Each story, inspirational quote, and teaching offers mindfulness-enhancing techniques that anyone can relate to. You don’t need to be a Buddhist to find the Buddha’s teachings motivational. As the Dalai Lama says, “Don’t try to use what you learn from Buddhism to be a Buddhist; use it to be a better whatever-you-already-are.”

  So whether it’s Mother Teresa’s acts of charity, Gandhi’s perseverance, or your aunt Betty’s calm demeanor, as long as you’re motivated to be better today than you were yesterday, it doesn’t matter who inspires you. Regardless of religion, geographical region, race, ethnicity, color, gender, sexual orientation, age, ability, flexibility, or vulnerability, if you do good you feel good, and if you do bad you feel bad.

  Buddhism isn’t just about meditating. It’s about rolling up your sleeves to relieve some of the suffering in the world. If you are ready to be a soldier of peace in the army of love, welcome to Buddhist Boot Camp!

  I find television very educational. Every time someone switches it on, I go into another room and read a good book. —Groucho Marx

  Basic Training

  Title Page

  Dedication

  What Is Buddhist Boot Camp All About

  Introduction

  MINDFULNESS

  Grasping

  Training the Mind

  The Big Picture

  Life Is a Piece of Cake

  Less Is More

  Unlearn

  Sit Happens

  We Are the Victims of Our Own Choices

  Utopia

  Leave No Trace

  LOVE AND RELATIONSHIPS

  Love Is the Recognition of Beauty

  What a Healthy Relationship Looks Like

  My Wedding Day

  Feelings vs. Emotions

  Sexual Responsibility

  How a Short Talk Can Make a Big Difference

  The Healing Power of Love

  RELIGION/SPIRITUALITY

  A Simple Definition of God

  The Divinity Within

  The Danger of Scripture

  Pray, Meditate, or Both?

  Leading by Example

  Karma

  The Message, Not the Messenger

  Buddhism as a Windshield Wiper

  Teaching Kids How to Think, Not What to Think

  Everyone Is Your Teacher

  A Pseudo-Problem with the Golden Rule

  UNDERSTANDING

  The Opposite of What You Know Is Also True

  Rewriting the Stories We Tell Ourselves

  One Man’s Truth Is Another Man’s Blasphemy

  Repentance

  Still Learning

  Middle Ground

  The Beauty of Gray

  Live and Let Live

  Voting

  SUCCESS

  True Luxury

  Careers Are Overrated

  When to Walk Away

  Success Means Being Happy

  Redefining “Enough”

  A Simple Life

  Knowing Is Not Even Half the Battle

  ANGER, INSECURITIES, AND FEARS

  At the Root of Our Suffering

  The Origin of Anger

  The Two Wolves

  Note the Antidote

  It’s Never Too Late

  Controlling Your Temper

  Insecurities

  The Pain Behind Our Fears

  LIVING IN GRATITUDE

  Grateful for Each Breath

  Prevention Is the Best Cure

  Versions of Violence

  You’re in Charge!

  Why Gratitude Is So Important

  A Simple Way to Be the Change

  Thoughts, Words, and Actions

  Doing the “Right Thing”

  Activism

  Permanence

  The Charter for Compassion

  Easier Said Than Done

  About the Author

  Copyright

  About the Publisher

  Introduction

  To make a long story short . . .

  I sat there in front of the Tibetan Lama, wearing my maroon robes after years of studying Buddhism. “With all due respect,” I said, “I don’t believe the Buddha ever intended for his teachings to get THIS complicated!”

  My teacher looked around at all the statues of deities with multiple arms and chuckled, “The Buddha didn’t do this! The Tibetan culture did; this is their way. Why don’t you try Zen? I think you’d like it!”

  So I bowed out of the temple, took off my robes, and moved into a Zen monastery far from home. Zen was simpler; that much was true (the walls were blank and I loved it), but the teachings were still filled with all the dogma that sent me running from religion in the first place.

  There are many incredible books out there that cover all aspects of religion, philosophy, psychology and physics, but I was looking for something less “academic,” so to speak. I was looking for something inspirational that people today would not only have the attention span to read all the way through, but actually understand and also implement in their daily lives. I pictured a simple guide to being happy, and in it just two words: “Be Grateful.”

  Gratitude has a way of turning what we have into enough, and that is the basic idea behind Buddhist Boot Camp.

  The short chapters convey everything I have learned over the years in a way that is easy to understand, without you needing to know anything about Buddhism ahead of time. In fact, this book is not about being a Buddhist; it’s about being a Buddha.

  It is very possible (and perfectly okay) for someone who is Catholic, Muslim, Atheist or Jewish, for example, to still find the Buddha’s teachings inspirational. You can love Jesus, repeat a Hindu mantra, and still go to temple after morning meditation. Buddhism is not a threat to any religion, it actually strengthens your existing faith by expanding your love to include all beings.

  “Boot Camp” is a training method, and Buddhism is all about training the mind. Many people claim they don’t have time to meditate every morning, but still want spiritual guidance without any dogma or rituals attached. That is exactly what Buddhist Boot Camp provides in this quick and easy-to-digest format.

  You are now a soldier of peace in the army of love; welcome to Buddhist Boot Camp!

  Your brother,

  Timber Hawkeye

  MINDFULNESS

  Grasping

  Just as we habitually hoard old birthday cards and souvenirs, bank statements and receipts, clothes, broken appliances and old magazines, we also hang on to pride, anger, outdated opinions and fears.

  If we’re so attached to tangible things, imagine how difficult letting go of opinions must be (let alone opening our minds to new ideas, perspectives, possibilities and futures). Our beliefs inevitably solidify to be the only truth and reality that we know, which puts a greater distance between us and anyone whose beliefs are different. This distance not only segregates us, it feeds our pride.

  All of this grasping, by the way, stems from fear.

  Why are we so terrified of change, strangers, the new or the unknown? Has the world not continually shown us beauty, sincerity and love through every generation? Are we so focused on the darkness that we no longer see or even remember the light? This is like The NeverEnding Story, if you remember it, wherein the minute people stop believing in a reality, it ceases to ex
ist.

  Love is real, people! And it’s all around us. It vibrates beneath every act of kindness, service, art and family.

  Fear is also very real; it permeates every doubt, despair, hesitation, hatred, jealousy, anger, pride and deceit.

  Habitually contemplate whether your thoughts stem from love or from fear. If your thoughts originate in love, then follow them. But if they originate from a place of fear, then dig deep to find the root of your fear. Only then will you be able to finally let go of it so that fear no longer limits your possibilities.

  There’s nothing to complain about, no reason to be afraid, and everything is possible if we live FOR each other.

  As far as I’m concerned, anything not meant to benefit others is simply not worth undertaking.

  All the happiness in the world stems from wanting others to be happy, and all the suffering in the world stems from wanting the self to be happy. —Shantideva

  Training the Mind

  Your mind is like a spoiled rich kid! You have raised it to think whatever it wants, whenever it wants to and for however long, with no regard for consequence or gratitude. And now that your mind is all grown, it never listens to you! In fact, sometimes you want to focus on something, but your mind keeps drifting away to whatever IT wants to think about. Other times, when you really want to stop thinking about something, your mind “can’t help it.”

  Training the mind means being in charge of your decisions instead of succumbing to cravings and so-called “uncontrollable urges.” Can you think of a better method for training a spoiled rich kid than some serious boot camp?

  First things first: stop granting yourself everything you crave. Doing so simply conditions the spoiled kid to know that it can continue having whatever it wants.

  Please do not mistake this for deprivation, because that’s not what I’m suggesting. You can still have ice cream, for example, but only when you decide to, not when a craving “takes over.” There is a difference.

  So when a thought arises, just watch it; don’t react to it. “Oh, I really want ice cream” . . . that’s nice; see what it’s like to want something but not always get it.

  The first few times that you try to train your mind you will see the little kid in you throw a tantrum, which is actually hilarious. But it’s understandable; you’ve never said “no” to it before. It’s time you start!

  You will eventually notice that you actually have more freedom to choose once you’re in control of your choices. It’s tricky; I just hope this chapter makes sense.

  Things turn out best for those who make the best of the way things turn out. —Art Linkletter

  The Big Picture

  We are urgently rushing toward some goal or dream, or an ever-elusive “finish line” of some sort. Under the pretense of pursuing happiness (and the heavy weight of questions like “Where do you see yourself five years from now?”), we imagine a different version of ourselves existing in the distant future somewhere—often richer, calmer, stable and wise.

  As a result, we spend very little time appreciating where we are today. By being so focused on how things “could be,” we are under-appreciating how great things already are.

  Unfortunately, this mindset affects how we approach almost everything else in life: instead of being grateful for what we already have, we exhaust ourselves with cravings and longings for what we haven’t yet achieved; and rather than seeing the beauty and blessing of the friendships and relationships in our lives (and how fortunate we are to have them in the first place), we regard them as inferior to the imaginary versions we’ve created of them in our minds.

  If we give ourselves very little credit for how far we’ve already come, we tend to give others little to no credit for their own efforts in life. When we’re impatient with ourselves, how can we possibly be forgiving of others? And as long as we continue judging ourselves when we look in the mirror, we’ll be doing the same to everyone around us.

  Wouldn’t it be great to stop, if only for a minute on a regular basis, and reflect on how wonderful everything is?

  Pause for a moment and honor the progress you’ve already made in your life, acknowledge the gifts you do have, and appreciate life itself for a few breaths.

  We are continually evolving, growing, learning and expanding. And let’s face it, we will never be “done.”

  Take a step back and notice how the small details we fret about seem to disappear when we look at the big picture.

  I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be. —Douglas Adams

  Life Is a Piece of Cake

  When a friend recently asked me if there is anything I would change about my life, I instinctively said, “Absolutely not! I am more content than I’ve ever been, and happier than I ever thought would be possible.”

  His response was, “Surely you would like to have more money, a bigger house or SOMETHING, no?” And my answer to that was . . . “No.” I mean, I am already happy; who knows what more money would do to my life?!

  It’s like this: if life is a cake recipe that we are trying to perfect, then I’ve got my recipe down JUST RIGHT for the time being (with the ideal amount of flour, sugar, baking soda, etc.). More sugar, for example, would not necessarily make a better cake. In fact, it might ruin it!

  So if you’re not happy with your life, figure out which ingredients make it bitter and take them out. Don’t believe commercials that tell you to spread more frosting on the top, because then you would simply wind up with a bitter cake that has frosting on it.

  People say things like, “If I just go on vacation to Hawaii, then my life will be better!” The problem is that when you return home from the Islands (or, in other words, when you’re done licking the frosting), your bitter cake will still be there waiting for you.

  But, and this is the really good part, if you get the ingredients JUST RIGHT, then your life is awesome (with or without frosting). Anything fun you do on top of that is, well, icing on the cake!

  We get to try a new recipe every morning (especially if we live our lives to the fullest). So even if your cake ends up bitter one day, that’s okay—make it differently tomorrow. Just never blame other people if your cake doesn’t turn out; we each bake our own.

  Here’s a secret: while everyone’s recipe is a little different, the main ingredients for a successful batter are love, gratitude, kindness and patience. And the single most common ingredient that makes people’s cake bitter is fear, so don’t use it!

  Happy baking, everybody!

  If we always do what we’ve always done, we will always be who we’ve always been. —Anonymous

  Less Is More

  My dad wanted to see what my life was like after years of hearing me talk about simplifying and being a minimalist. I told him that to TRULY understand it, he’d have to come live with me for a month, so he did.

  He is very much the materialistic consumer, so when he first walked into my little apartment he said, “OMG! You don’t have anything!”

  After living with me for a month, however, preparing my meals with me, going for long walks every day, reading, writing, meeting with people one-on-one, and truly tasting the simplicity of my life, he hugged me before boarding his flight back home and said, “there is nothing missing from your life!”

  It brought tears to my eyes because he actually got it. Both his statements were true: I don’t have anything (in the materialistic sense), yet there is nothing missing from my life.

  When I shared this particular story on Buddhist Boot Camp’s Facebook page, I received hundreds of wonderful comments from readers who truly understood the significance of that moment with my dad.

  Working part-time so that I can live full-time is the best decision I’ve ever made. I don’t feel like I have “sacrificed” a life of “luxury”; I’ve simply exchanged material goods and the illusion of abundance for actual, true bliss.

  I moved apartments every six months when I was younger, so I lear
ned not to keep ANYTHING that I would later have to pack. No knickknacks, no souvenirs, no “stuff.”

  It feels great to be so light and free from any attachment to things. But if you’re torn about throwing or giving away something that has a memory attached to it, keep in mind that you’re only giving away the object, not the memory.

  If you’re worried about not remembering something, take a picture of it (the photo doesn’t take up any room). The past will let go of you if you let go of the past.

  Now spread your wings and fly!

  You don’t have anything, yet there is nothing missing from your life. —My dad

  Unlearn

  I’m not sure if wisdom is so much about acquiring additional knowledge, or more about letting go of the illusion that we know any ultimate truths.

  My dad made an interesting observation when I explained my life journey to him. “You’re not trying to learn anything new,” he said. “You’re trying to go back to being two years old, aren’t you?”

  To some degree, I think that’s true. I mean, I didn’t know how to be prejudiced or judgmental at that age. I was fascinated by everybody regardless of race, weight, height, gender or even species.

  In fact, I think everybody is born caring and compassionate, with the capacity to unconditionally love all sentient beings without exception. As soon as we are old enough, however, our parents, teachers, preachers, and society teach us to only love and trust family members or, at most, people with the same colored skin.

  As a result, by the time we reach high school, we’re so disconnected from one another that we can watch an entire nation starving on TV and not feel an ounce of compassion simply because they don’t look like us. It’s sometimes not until after college (if at all) that we wake up to realize, “Hey, wait a minute. They’re people too!”

  I admit having felt very distant from people who were “different” from me in my preteen years. But we certainly don’t have to stay who we were when we were younger! I can’t even watch a caught fish flopping on the sand without feeling its agony nowadays, let alone see another human in pain.